And believe me, we all have to check our mixes on different systems and make adjustments. Do you listen to commersial CDs on you JBLs? Maybe that will give you a clue on how to balance your mix. Try to make it sound like them! Headphones is a good way to check stuff in your mixes: rumbling, stereo balance and so on, but it is not suitable for mixing. Maybe the sound of your room is making it difficult to mix? Sit close to the monitors. As for loudness, put a limiter on the master fader and let it cut (attenuate) 4-6dbs on the loudest parts. You will gain several dbs.